Thinking about my inner self

As all of my paperwork and approvals are in the hands of the clinic in Montreal, my thoughts turn more to my inner self and how I prepare for the future.

When it comes to any surgical procedure, post-surgical depression is very common, no matter how much you desire and welcome the procedure. There is a lot of stress, anxiety, concerns about recovery, concerns about complications, and so much more. For trans women, GCS feels like it has almost become routine, but it's still complicated and there are risks of post-surgical complications. We don't escape this risk!

So, needless to say, it has me thinking and I have found myself more recently turning to what feels tried and true for women since time immemorial: Witchcraft. Specifically, I have been reading and learning more on Wicca, along with Tarot and other divining tools, and I have been creating a space in my home that brings me peace and contentment.

For me, it is about the connection to self and to the world around me. To be able to be effective for my community, to advocate and defend, I need to feel whole. To be able to approach my personal future, and GCS, I need to feel whole. I need to feel balanced. The rituals and meditations designed to connect you to a wider, more fulfilling, world are a means to help me feel balanced. I cannot heal around me if I cannot heal myself and vice versa.

I have often compared my gender experience as though I was wandering the woods, admiring the creatures within, smelling the flowers, feeling the rough bark of the trees around me. I have no destination as I wander, I seek to explore and to find. One day, I imagine that I will come upon a meadow or clearing that feels like home, a place where I can stop and find my happiness and contentment.

My internal journey to connect more to my inner self is much the same. I am finding a way to that place of happiness and contentment as my transition progresses and my internal sense of wellness grows. Expect I'll blog more on this as I grow along my path.

In the meanwhile, those who know me know that I love all animals, but I have an affinity for cats. I am, after all, a Leo! I also have an absolutely adorable and affectionate cat companion named Betsy. My place is decorated heavily with cat motifs. I have clothing, including shoes, with cats on them. Suffice to say, I love cats! So, when I encountered this, how could I resist?

The set is absolutely gorgeous. Though I have other sets for more regular use, this one brings me a lot of joy and we all need joy in our lives.